Healing Day 3 - I'm Not a Crack Head, Cracked Face Maybe

I was up all night again last night, I just couldn't sleep from the pain. I had taken maximum doses of Tylenol and Ibuprofen again, but they didn't do much. The Count of Monte Cristo has been my friend through this, reading helps take my mind off the pain, and it's such a good book.  I put out a 3 or 4 AM request for a friend to make a Waffle House run with since I was up.  No one else was.

Several of my friends and family had been on me to call my doctor to get something for the pain.  This morning the pain was worse than ever.  Honestly after three kids, the worst pain I have ever felt.  I was tired, and things were waring on my nerves which seemed to make my face hurt worse as well.  I finally decided to give in and call my doctor to get medication for the pain and to sleep since I think it's been over 5 days without sleep.  I left a message with the nurse, but the pain was intensifying rapidly.  Soon I was in tears, which made it even worse and I was crying out.  I guess I was in pain meltdown mode.  My husband who was flustered called the doctor and got his nurse.  Her responses were things like "it's supposed to make sores" "we don't call in pain or sleeping medication", "you have precancer, you don't have cancer" and "it is supposed to look all red."  This was frustrating, and for me, pushed to wits end infuriating.  I didn't ask for her diagnosis, I don't give a rip how I look, or  did I even convey that I did, I just needed some pain medication and I needed it immediately.  I did not want to go to immediate care to get it, I did not want to go out in the heat and daylight for a trip to get it, I was in excruciating pain, and wanted something for it now. 

I blame the crack heads for this.  As I mentioned in an earlier post, Pensacola is like the worst city in the country for Dr.'s writing prescriptions for drug addicts who go Dr. shopping to load up on Oxycontin and the like.  We've had a few bad doctors who knowingly did this, but most are innocent and some of them have been duped by the addicts.  I think Dr.'s are scared.  If they are suspected the police show up, take their computers and files, and they end up in the local press.  Can't blame them for wanting to avoid that.  The problem comes that when you get a patient like myself, who avoids taking even Tylenol and is really in agony by the time they break down and request something, they get treated like a junkie trying to make a score.  My husband wants me to get a new doctor.  He did not meet mine.  I really felt my doctor was great, very down to earth, knowledgeable and kind.  The moment that the nurse or whoever she was spoke with him, he ok'd the prescription for something for the pain, Hydrocodone, but they couldn't call in anything to help me sleep, I suspect because they think I am a junkie.  I'm so tired right now, and actually I feel my meds kicking in right now a bit, that I may be not thinking clearly.  Remember these are just my thoughts and observations.

One of the nurses comments still had me really ticked off. She said they don't give pain medication to patients going through treatment with flourouracil.  Nearly every other blog I found on treatment with flourouracil indicated that the patients at some point were prescribed pain medication and sleeping medication.  My story is not much different than the others I found.  Everyone has a lot of pain which causes a lack of sleep.  If it is possible to give patients something for this, why would a doctor choose to let a patient suffer.  Knowing what this treatment causes, logically it seems a doctor should also prescribe pain medication, or let the patient know they might need it and to call if they do.  I really believe the nurse needs round of topical chemotherapy treatment before she tries to tell another patient that it normally doesn't hurt that bad.  Remember my doctor telling me it would get the point that I would hate him?  I don't, but the nurse lady really has me ticked off.  In the future this seems like an issue that needs to be handled differently.  I will talk to him about it when I see him Monday.   I'm also one of those people who hates to complain, and I tend to let others walk allover me, but I will say something.  

I think eating the Indian food last night really added to my pain, I swear the spices are coming through my pores.  The stress of not sleeping makes me very irritable, and when anyone starts to irritate me, my face just starts throbbing.  It just seems one thing feeds off another. 

I've been applying extra moisturizing hydrocortizone cream which seems to be helping.  I have to apply it about 5 or six times per day.  Sometimes I use Aveeno ultra calming night cream, but it is highly scented which turns me away. Just something nice and creamy and unscented would be nice.  Any ideas?  I was wondering about Desitin or diaper rash cream.  One way to describe how my face feels is chapped.  Many people have written about how Vaseline saved them through his treatment.  I personally just can' t handle the greasy stuff on my face. 

It's one in the afternoon and I feel the medication starting to kick in a bit.  Maybe once the pain fades away I will be able to sleep.  It said to take one or two, normally I'm always a take one kind of person, but today I went straight to two.  Saying a prayer this helps.