Healing Day 23 - 7/30/2014
Today the love of my life reminded me that they loved me for who I am on the inside, as well as the outside. That I'm beautiful always, inside and out. Those words made my day.
I would never consider myself beautiful on the outside, but normal I think. We take for granted being normal, fitting in with the crowd. Last night I was still a little rough looking but went out for dinner and it wasn't too bad. I'm blending in with normal... almost, just a few little second glances here and there. I feel so much empathy for people whom for whatever reason feel that they don't look "normal" and hide at home. Everyday in the normal zone is a blessing and we should never take that for granted.
I ate chicken wings last night for "National Chicken Wing Day". I have to be careful with my lip because if I wipe it with a napkin too much it bleeds quite a bit, not cool when out at dinner. Happily I made it through the meal without springing a leak. I had mild wings with buffalo sauce and garlic, much to my relief they did not sting. Today I ate a few wasabi almonds and I'm good! Yeah!! I think I can gradually go back to eating my spicy stuff. I'll still avoid getting anything salty or too spicy on my lip for obvious reasons. The wound on my lip seems to be healing faster if I let air get to it and not cover the wound in Carmex which makes it soft, and tear off and bleed easily. I put Carmex on the rest of my lips though. Life is almost back to normal. People say "I hope its the last time you have to do that." Its not. I try to take the time to explain I feel lucky that I have the option to have this treatment because I believe with all my heart it beats the alternative.
My face is still too scaly for makeup. I'm getting more and more of those soft baby butt spots though.
I hope that you have a support system and I really think that you should share this blog or others with them ahead of time so that they have an idea of what you will be going through. There is the emotional component to it as well that you should plan for. If you are normally out and about, being stuck inside is not easy and gets depressing. It seems like the end of the world the first time you have this treatment. The 2nd time you kind of know what to expect. It's not fun, but it's not unbearable either. Get lots of indoor things to read and watch. Maybe catch up on a few of those TV series on Netflix that you missed. If you work from home, you've got it made. Maybe let your friends know in advance what to expect, and let them come over and bring you ice cream or a Frappuccino or something. Planning ahead helps. You don't want to have to run out for something you need in the middle of a rough day.
Christina,
ReplyDeleteJust checking in to see how you are? Hope you are doing much better and healed by now. School started here in Louisiana today so things are back to normal.
Hope you will post an update soon.
Betty
Christina-
ReplyDeleteI am so glad I found your blog. I am starting the treatment tomorrow, and am thankful for all the information you shared.
Thanks,
Sheryl
How are you doing now? I'm glad the blog helped. Please keep us posted! Hugs!
DeleteChristina, I just found your blog about your experiences with flourouracil therapy, and I want to say thank you for sharing this difficult journey. I just started treatment with this chemo for my lower lip. I have been a gardner, kayaker, skier, etc and I, too, am paying the price. Unfortunately, my doctor did not prepare me for what was going to happen and how much pain and discomfort wss involved. My husband and I feel better after reading your blog. We were concerned that I was having an adverse or allergic reaction to the cream. We saw that all of the redness, swelling, blistering, and peeling is all part of the process. I hope folks (especially the youger people-because of the sun's cumulative effects) read this and take appropriate actions to protect themselves. It is painful, and if not taken care of can be life threatening. So, again, thank you! Sue W.
ReplyDeleteSo glad I stumbled upon your blog. I start my 'cream therapy' January 1. I've had two Moh's surgeries since August. One was squamous, the other basal, and have had another biopsy. My doc wants me to do the cream as a preventative. Thank you for sharing your experience. At 41, I never thought I would be facing this, especially since I have dark hair and eyes, and tan well.
ReplyDeleteDee Dee,
DeleteThank you for sharing on the blog! How are you doing? Hopefully the treatments will prevent you from developing any other areas that you have to have procedures on. Hugs!
Today I found your blog, it's Feb. 13, 2015. I pray you are still checking your blog for reader comments and will read my comments and get in touch with me! There is only ONE other person who created a blog and she did it over 5 years ago.
ReplyDeleteHelp! Today is Day 4 for me, the first time I've ever tried Fluorouracil. I'm so disappointed my Dr. didn't fully explain what exactly would happen to me once I start applying the cream ALL OVER MY ENTIRE FACE. I found out by myself after researching the Internet and stumbled upon your blog after looking at horrifying photos of patients. I'm so afraid of the pain that will be coming shortly and the itching, discomfort, etc. I've had 2 basal cell carcinomas within the last 2 years, the dermatologist thought this medicine would help prevent any more showing up. If anyone is reading my comments (including Christina) and feel you can help ease my fears or explain in detail exactly what I can expect to happen to me in the coming days, and add things that you did to ease your own pain, I'd sincerely appreciate you getting in touch with me. Anything you have done to ease your pain and discomfort will be helpful. Please write a reply on Christina's blog Comments Section so I can see it. If you provide your email address or phone number, I will exchange mine with you and we can talk about it via those communications rather than publicly doing it on the Internet? Someone please reply here...I hope to hear from Christina herself but as I said, I don't know if she is even reading or checking her blog anymore since this was all written months ago. I will pull up this blog daily and check to see if anyone has replied to me. Thank you all in advance. I pray someone out there reads this and can help me with my many questions! I'm extremely nervous and afraid!
I hope you get this and I hope you got through your treatment easier than I did. I'm on Round 3 Day 7 of 14 now. I get to do my whole face every year now. I've read some people get to do it more often! Please update us if you get this! Hugs!!
DeleteI was directed to this Blog of Christina's through a friend who has also used this cream on her face, Fluorouracil. I feel sorry for the person who wrote the comments just above mine. These doctors really DO NOT fully explain exactly what this medicine will do to your face or any other body part you are directed to use it on. This is shameful on the part of the doctors. The patient should be told EXACTLY what to expect and then make their own decision if they are ready and willing to go through this torture. We should NOT have to rely on the Internet to gather information on medicines doctors give to us...the doctors should tell us exactly what to expect. I used this medicine on my face and was actually screaming in pain every time I bent over the sink to attempt to wash my face. You are supposed to try to wash your face before you apply the second dose on in the evenings. I had to apply it every morning & every evening. I too, had two basal cell carcinomas within two years and my dermatologist told me he wanted me to use this medicine to prevent future cancers from appearing on my face. He said it's not foolproof but maybe 80% on the positive side of cancers NOT reoccurring. By day 4 I was red as a crayon, it felt like 1000 bee stings everywhere on my face, about 50 red WELTS appeared which turned into bleeding pus filled welts about day 10. It was disgusting and pain unlike I've ever felt before and I've had more that 18 surgeries for other illnesses. This pain was excruciating! I had to call my doctor to give me pain pills and cortisone cream to help with the severe itching. I felt like clawing off my entire face, I couldn't sleep or function during daytime hours. I stayed inside my house, hiding from sunlight which was supposed to make my face sting even worse had I ventured out into the daylight. I was isolated, lonely, looked like a monster and when I cried, my tears stung my cheeks so badly I screamed. This medicine is NOT for the weak of heart. You must be an extremely strong individual to attempt this topical chemotherapy treatment. The woman who made this Blog is to be congratulated and thanked a million times over. Christina has helped so many of us by posting her photos online and telling us exactly what to expect on a day to day basis. Otherwise we'd never know. You certainly can't rely on your dermatologist to FULLY explain what's going to happen to you or you'd probably be too frightened to do it! Christina, it would be helpful if you would please post some more photos of your face AFTER your treatment so we could see what your facial skin looks like say on day 20, day 30, etc. How long did it take for you to recover and look normal again? Please let us know if you're alright now and cancer free now? I'm interested in your health today as I'm sure many others are also. Let us know if any skin cancers appeared AFTER you used this cream. Keep us up to date. I will tell many more people about your Blog so they can read what this medicine will do to you. Where are the statistics to tell us if this cream really works or not? Do you have any links to direct us to? Please continue to help, we appreciate people out there like you who care about others. You're a blessing. Good luck to you, be well always. Sincerely, A Christina Fan!
ReplyDeleteWow!! You poor thing!! Your reaction sounds much more severe than mine, which as you can see is pretty bad. I've seen a lot of different reactions depending on skin type and dosage. I have a friend who is more olive complected and only applied it one time a day, it wasn't nearly as severe on her. S7he wore make up and went to work everyday.
DeleteI am on Round 3 now, Day 7. My doctor said I will have to do this every year the rest of my life now. I'm 45. Oh joy!! I will always have the precancerous areas all over my entire face, the goal of the treatments is to keep them from turning into anything more, which you understand from personal experience.
I apologize for not getting back to everyone as quickly as I'd like. I have 3 young boys and teach elementary full time, so I don't get any down time during the school year. Seems the only time I get time to stop and blog is when I'm going through these treatments. It is as helpful for me to chronicle my journey as it is helpful for others going through the treatment to read it and connect with each other.
Please update us on how you are doing. Hugs!
My name is Diane,I am on about day 7 or 8. I have never written to anyone on any blog. I am so grateful for the ability to find this one . I guess I really am in shock right now. Did I say that I was grateful to find you?!!! So many friendships start with the words, "What? You Too! Well, I thought that I was the only one!!!" You are a dear friend to me,even though I have never met you. I don't know if you will ever check this blog again, but I just want to say thank you. I feel like I can get through this now. I will check back.
ReplyDeleteHi hun.have been reading ue blog re the death cream.im about to start round 2.this is so the worst because with round 1 u dont know wat to expect.did my first lot of cream this mornin and about 3 hours untill my next.you are amazing and i thank you from the bottom of my heart.as with you i have children(5)and will still need to do school runs and that scares me more than the treatment as from b4 cant wait for the comments :what have you been upto ect.anyway must stop moanin.much respect to u.ur amazing.xx.tash
ReplyDeleteHey Tash!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing! How did your death cream treatment round 2 go? I'm now on Day 7 of 14 - Round 3. I get to do this every year now. Yeah Me!! I get really busy being a mom to my three boys and teaching and sometimes don't get to my blog as much as I'd like. I started my treatment the day before summer break started. I'm looking forward to getting some normal summer fun in July maybe. I like your comment about 3 hours until your next treatment. I dread having to put more of that stuff on too, sometimes I go an hour or two late because I just can't make myself do it. Bet you are looking awesome now though! Hugs!!
Diane,
ReplyDeleteWow!! Thank you!! I'm a teacher and just started Summer Break and Round 3, now on day 7 myself. How are you doing? I'm glad the blog helped!! I know it helps me to go back and remind myself what to expect each time, to compare what days looked like, and most of all to get the inspiration I need from my friends who are going through this same battle. Hugs to you Diane, I hope you find this message. I'd love to hear how you are doing!
Thank you for writing this blog. Since I am experiencing this nightmare too it's nice to be able to have some opinion of what will happen next. I just want to rip my face off right now.
ReplyDeleteI had a short treatment - just 5 days. I am now on the 5th day since stopping the cream. My chin is HORRIBLE, blotchy faces on the temples and forehead, overall itchy and peeling. I was told 2 weeks from start to finish healing, but I'm afraid it will take me longer to heal because I am sooooo red. I couldn't imagine using this for 14+ days.. I've been taking Benadryl, Tylenol and laying a cold towel no my face to relieve the pain. PLEASE tell me this will get better!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteIt gets better.
ReplyDeleteWatch for spots that appear without warning -- jump on those with the next efudex treatment, fast. And feel satisfaction when they turn into painful, itchy red skin that will be replaced soon with clear, safe skin.
Best wishes to all who are going through this. It's rough. But it beats the alternative, skin grafts and cancer that spreads. You've got this.
(Aside to doctors: Could you please be specific about what patients should expect from this treatment? We should not have to be so dependent on the internet for information about this.)
Just started 4 days of treatment and done 2 of 8 treatments. My doctor showed me images of an elderly man who used the treatment. He has me apply steroid cream before the 5FU and Calcipotreine. I appreciate seeing photos of what to expect. My instructions were to apply only to my cheeks. I've had Mohs surgery once that required cartridge grafting from my ear.
ReplyDelete